"That's what true friendship does; it humbles you with it's love."
I said that to a friend awhile ago and it has resonated with me ever since. Think about that for a minute...true friendship humbles you with it's love. Examine your friendships. Do you have any friendships in which there is so much mutual affection and love that it humbles you? That it makes you feel so unworthy but utterly thankful to God for blessing you with that person? The better question is do you make anyone feel like that? Do you love any of your friends so purely, selflessly, and Christ-like that they feel overwhelmed and humbled by your love? If not...why? What is preventing you from loving like that? Is it laziness? Is it selfishness? Is it fear?
I know for me it is fear. It's fear that I am going to open myself up and put myself out there and then I am going to be rejected. Fear that I am going to put so much effort into something and practically kill myself investing in someone who is going to just suck the life out of me by taking, taking, and more taking without giving anything. Not that I'm in relationships for what people give me, but there comes a point when one can't give any more without having something put in. It's like a bank - there is only so much you can take out of your account without depositing anything before the account is overdrawn. My eyes have been opened lately to how people treat one another. I've watched interactions between my friends and other people and I'm blown away with how little respect and honor we treat one another with. We so often taken one another for granted, just expecting that it won't matter because the other person is always going to be there. I think we forget how short life can be and priceless each moment with a friend or loved one is. We forget that in John 13:35 Jesus said, "By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." If I were to take an honest evaluation of my relationships and look at how my friend and I interact with one another...I don't know that outsiders looking in would always know that we are disciples of Jesus. If one were to ask us, we would have a lot of excuses...I was only kidding...I'm tired...I'm out of it...I have a lot on my mind...I'm busy...I'm stressed. I've said these kinds of things before myself. But honestly....it doesn't matter. There is never an excuse for not loving someone. There is never an excuse for being rude and selfish. There is never an excuse for treating anyone, especially those you love, as though they don't matter. We should never be too busy, too stressed, too tired, too whatever to show the love of Jesus in every interaction.We should take every opportunity to let those around us know how much we value them.
We do this in the little things. Initiating conversation. Being genuinely interested in what the other person is saying. Being more concerned about other's welfare than the bad day we've just had or the ten million things on our never-ending to do list. Calling just to say hi. Following up on the issues going on in other's lives. We must get outside of ourselves and see others as more important than ourselves. And we can't just spout the rhetoric...we have to follow through with actions.The challenge is this: examine your heart. See what it is that is keeping you from loving the people in your life in a way that humbles them. See what it is that is causing you to be lazy, selfish, or fearful and ask God to remove that from your life. Ask Him to change your heart so that you can love others as He has loved you. Make an intentional effort this week to humble someone with your love.
"By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:35
Showing posts with label friendship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friendship. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Never Stop Loving
Why is it that we put so much stock in what other people think of us? Yes, God created us to need one another, to love one another, and be loved by one another. And yes, loving involves caring about what the other person thinks. Yet, when love is reciprocated, what he/she thinks isn't a concern, because you know he/she loves you. And if it is a Christ-like and Christ-based love, (which hopefully it is) then you can have the confidence that even when things are rough, that other person still loves you and that you still matter to him/her. And I think that that knowledge is at times even sweeter than the simple fact that the other person loves you.
I have this friend that I met my freshman year in college. At the time, she was the best friend I ever had. We were nothing alike and had no business being friends, except that God put us together. I felt safer, more accepted, more loved, and better understood in our friendship than I had in any other previous friendship. We helped each other through some tough times, and went through some crazy things together. We had our rough patches (as any friendship that is honoring of God and bringing glory to Him will--the enemy doesn't like relationships that work like they should), but through them all there was a mutual understanding that she and I loved each other and that was never going to change. We spurred one another on towards righteousness, we were constantly pointing each other towards Christ, and we were always sharing with one another what He was teaching us.
Then over the course of time things changed. The single road that we had walked together over the last two years (and sometimes carried one another on) began to split and turn into two. She made some choices that weren't the wisest and began to be very defensive about everything. No longer could we share our hearts with one another, for they were no longer both beating for Christ as they once had. Yet I continued to pursue our friendship, to encourage her, and to try to love her like Christ does. However, when two roads diverge, be it ever so slightly at first, at some point they will have diverged to the point where they are headed in completely different directions, and a major detour on one or the other road would have to occur for them to cross once more.
Sadly, her road has diverged from all of our mutual friends and she refuses at this point to come back and meet us. While we do our best to bridge the gap, our devotion to the Master of the roads compels us to continue to follow His road. He is wise and loving and knows what is best. And as He can see the entire road and not just this length of the journey, He may see a point down the road when she accepts His hand of forgiveness and grace, and our roads will once again merge.
Until that time, I am left here brokenhearted over my loss. But even more brokenhearted for my friend who has no idea that the road she is on leads to destruction...or if she does, she simply doesn't care. Brokenhearted for who she once was and who she could be again. And brokenhearted that who she is now won't let me reach out to her. So here I am mourning for what was, broken for what is, and hoping for what will be.
Hoping? Yes. Despite the pain, the tears, the sleepless nights, and the broken relationships, I am still hoping. Praying that one day she will wake up and let God back onto the throne of her life. That she will realize that all I want to do is love her and that all He wants to do is heal her. Praying that she will jump from the road to destruction to the road to redemption once more, and that we will once again have sweet fellowship as we follow the Master along His way. Even if she never speaks to me again, I will take 1 Samuel 12:23 to be my verse, when it says "As for me, I will certainly not sin against the LORD by ending my prayers for you. And I will continue to teach you what is good and right." I will continue to love her, continue to pray for her, and continue to hope that God in His grace will once again pull her from the miry pit and set her feet firmly on a rock.
Never stop praying my friends. For anyone. No one is beyond help, and no one is beyond the reach of the One who stretched out His arms and died. My friend will be wooed by Him once more. Whether I get to be a part of that or a part of her life after that happens is secondary to her being once again on His road, following His ways. Never forget that the salvation and restoration of another is more important that your personal comfort and desires. 2 Samuel 14:14 says, "All of us must die eventually. Our lives are like water spilled out on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. That is why God tries to bring us back when we have been separated from him. He does not sweep away the lives of those he cares about – and neither should you!" We must continue to spill out our lives for others, that they would be saved and restored. So keep hoping. Keep praying. Never stop loving.
I have this friend that I met my freshman year in college. At the time, she was the best friend I ever had. We were nothing alike and had no business being friends, except that God put us together. I felt safer, more accepted, more loved, and better understood in our friendship than I had in any other previous friendship. We helped each other through some tough times, and went through some crazy things together. We had our rough patches (as any friendship that is honoring of God and bringing glory to Him will--the enemy doesn't like relationships that work like they should), but through them all there was a mutual understanding that she and I loved each other and that was never going to change. We spurred one another on towards righteousness, we were constantly pointing each other towards Christ, and we were always sharing with one another what He was teaching us.
Then over the course of time things changed. The single road that we had walked together over the last two years (and sometimes carried one another on) began to split and turn into two. She made some choices that weren't the wisest and began to be very defensive about everything. No longer could we share our hearts with one another, for they were no longer both beating for Christ as they once had. Yet I continued to pursue our friendship, to encourage her, and to try to love her like Christ does. However, when two roads diverge, be it ever so slightly at first, at some point they will have diverged to the point where they are headed in completely different directions, and a major detour on one or the other road would have to occur for them to cross once more.
Sadly, her road has diverged from all of our mutual friends and she refuses at this point to come back and meet us. While we do our best to bridge the gap, our devotion to the Master of the roads compels us to continue to follow His road. He is wise and loving and knows what is best. And as He can see the entire road and not just this length of the journey, He may see a point down the road when she accepts His hand of forgiveness and grace, and our roads will once again merge.
Until that time, I am left here brokenhearted over my loss. But even more brokenhearted for my friend who has no idea that the road she is on leads to destruction...or if she does, she simply doesn't care. Brokenhearted for who she once was and who she could be again. And brokenhearted that who she is now won't let me reach out to her. So here I am mourning for what was, broken for what is, and hoping for what will be.
Hoping? Yes. Despite the pain, the tears, the sleepless nights, and the broken relationships, I am still hoping. Praying that one day she will wake up and let God back onto the throne of her life. That she will realize that all I want to do is love her and that all He wants to do is heal her. Praying that she will jump from the road to destruction to the road to redemption once more, and that we will once again have sweet fellowship as we follow the Master along His way. Even if she never speaks to me again, I will take 1 Samuel 12:23 to be my verse, when it says "As for me, I will certainly not sin against the LORD by ending my prayers for you. And I will continue to teach you what is good and right." I will continue to love her, continue to pray for her, and continue to hope that God in His grace will once again pull her from the miry pit and set her feet firmly on a rock.
Never stop praying my friends. For anyone. No one is beyond help, and no one is beyond the reach of the One who stretched out His arms and died. My friend will be wooed by Him once more. Whether I get to be a part of that or a part of her life after that happens is secondary to her being once again on His road, following His ways. Never forget that the salvation and restoration of another is more important that your personal comfort and desires. 2 Samuel 14:14 says, "All of us must die eventually. Our lives are like water spilled out on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. That is why God tries to bring us back when we have been separated from him. He does not sweep away the lives of those he cares about – and neither should you!" We must continue to spill out our lives for others, that they would be saved and restored. So keep hoping. Keep praying. Never stop loving.
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